jokes about kids

  • This match won't light. Which is weird because it did this morning.
  • I wonder how Police on bicycles arrest people... "Alright, get in the basket."
  • Kurt Cobain killed himself one month after Justin Bieber was born. He knew.
  • If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
  • Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.
  • I took my Call of Duty back to the shop today... I lost my virginity last night
  • My parents put us to sleep by tossing us up in the air. Of course, you have to have low ceilings for this method to work.
  • My son gets erections in the most unfortunate places... Mainly in his mouth and ass.
  • If a tree falls in the forest and nobody's around to hear it... ...have we found the perfect place for a Justin Bieber concert?
  • I was so ugly, my mother used to feed me with a slingshot
  • I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio
  • When my old man wanted sex, my mother would show him a picture of me.
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