drinking jokes

I used to be able to party all weekend... ...now, one night of drinking requires more time to recover than a minor surgery...
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I gave up drinking, smoking and sex. Worst 15 minutes of my life.If you don't drink, how would your friends know you love them at 3 AM?It's a ten minute walk from my house to the pub... Weirdly, it's a two hour walk from the pub to my house.
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