drinking jokes

I wanna throw a party with fake alcohol and see how many people act wasted.
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I'm not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk, we go to parties...I used to be able to party all weekend... ...now, one night of drinking requires more time to recover than a minor surgery...It's a ten minute walk from my house to the pub. Weirdly, it's a two hour walk back.
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